Birthing A Mother

On how I delivered my daughter into the world two years ago, but I really re-birthed myself.

Hi there! I’m Hunter. I’m a mother of a two-year-old daughter, married to my British husband, and we live in Northwest Florida along the beautiful white, sandy beaches. I share about sacred & slow living as well as my own personal journey in motherhood. Make sure to subscribe to have my posts delivered directly to your inbox. Thank you for being here.

Photo by Madeline Swainhart Photography.

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T W O.

It’s been two years since the Earth-shattering, re-arranging, all-encompassing transformation my body, mind, and soul went on. It was the sacred work I had been most called to do and yet never imagined was my purpose.

I became a mother.

Two years ago, I welcomed my daughter into the world at 8:05am after a beautiful night of laboring down, allowing her to emerge through the birth canal and into the world.

The portal hasn’t closed since.

I didn’t know it in those early days as I was completely consumed by breastfeeding and sleepless nights, that I was now the embodiment of creation incarnate. All I had to do was tune in. I remember, a few months in, feeling this energetic connection to the Earth and to the ethers like I’d never felt before, and knowing that there had been a metamorphosis. I became pregnant while deep in my maidenhood, and emerged a mother.

My pregnancy was a surprise. We’d only been married a few years and lived in the same country for about five months. We had no money and were calling my parent’s guesthouse home (still are). The one and only time I’d ever been “reckless” by saying, “oh we don’t need protection, it’s fine,” we made a baby.

But someone up above knew I needed her. Her little spirit baby soul said, “I’m ready. Here I come.”

The thing people told me over and over as I was pregnant was, “You will never be ready.”

And it brought me comfort because it’s true. There is nothing that will prepare you for becoming a parent. There is no one book, one course, one person that can teach you how to become a mother or father. Instead, it’s this intertwined dance you choreograph with the specific soul that chose you to raise them. And each and every soul will need you to show up in a completely different way.

So I wasn’t ready, but I was. I was ready to take on the galactic responsibility of raising a child. I was ready to hold her in my arms and whisper everything I knew to her as she fell asleep. I was ready to claim the power I had that was dormant all these years. I was ready to meet the unknown with complete trust in the path that must have been meant for me.

I birthed a magnificent, magical, indigo baby, but I also birthed myself.

I birthed a mother.

And I couldn’t have imagined it at any other time, in any other way.

Becoming a mother is accepting the responsibility to step into the full power of yourself, but if you allow the transformation to unfold, the creation that explodes out of you will be unlike anything you’ve ever experienced before.

You become connected to the Universe in a unique way as a mother. You are the creator, the storyteller, the dream weaver, the mystic, the witch, the wise woman, and when you unlock that deep awareness of all the magic you can weave, you are unstoppable. We need more mothers that are deeply connected in this world, to raise our babies in an aligned, expanded way. So don’t ever shy away from your role as a mother, because it’s the most powerful role you can ever take on. At least, that’s how it’s been for me.

A constant unraveling of who I thought I was supposed to be so I could now embrace who I was meant to become.

Two years. It’s been two years and while I honor who I was before, I don’t miss her.

She was unsettled, unsure, fearful of what lay ahead. While I still have those moments, there is a rootedness I experience now that brings me back to my center.

I don’t miss her, no. But oh how I wish I could hold her, and tell her she’s ready to roar.